Connecting with Family: Why a Mission Trip Will Change Your Kids

Connecting with family these days isn’t easy. There are the obvious family bonding activities other blogs suggest like eating together, reading, sports, church, etc., but what about doing a community service project together? More importantly, what about a mission trip?

I know it sounds crazy, but hear me out. It may be easier than you think.

For instance, a good idea might be to go to the Texas-Mexico border. My family has ministered to the people in The Colonias doing VBS, soccer camps, construction, painting, and food distribution for many years.

This one thing has changed my family and taught my kids things I could never teach them at home or at church. Going on a mission trip is that important. Really. 

Connecting with family away from your home and regular routines will make a difference.

RELATED: The Greatest Secret to Having Healthy Family Relationships

Why is Connecting with Family Important?

Connecting with family is important so your kids feel loved and important in your family unit. Parents who have strong relationships long-term tend to have kids who listen and do the right thing when they are older.

Also, kids who have bonded in their family tend to foster healthy connections and relationships with others because it was modeled in their family of origin.

The most meaningful family bonding activities my family has experienced are not at an amusement park, a sports field, or even a fun vacation. It has been through a service project in an impoverished area called The Colonias in South Texas.

The particular group our church has gone through every year is Hearts4Kids. It was a good choice for us because it was not only inexpensive but it was also close, not to mention that they are highly reputable. We know the leaders personally.

We also liked going on the trip because a lot of our family friends and their kids attended with us. It made it fun for our kids. We not only bonded as a family, but we bonded with other believers in our church.

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The Best Family Bonding Activities to Do As a Family

The best family bonding activities we have done together are to do mission trips at the South Texas border (The Colonias, South Texas).

You may wonder what are The Colonias. They are communities in an unincorporated makeshift area about a mile from the Texas-Mexico border. These areas are just beyond the municipal boundaries of any city or town.

Many sections of land have no drinking water, electricity, or sewage service. Texas has the largest number of Colonia residents; more than 500,000, mostly immigrants, who live in these shanty houses.

The land in these areas is subdivided by unscrupulous owners who sell a plot, often to buyers who don’t understand the terms of the agreement. Many times the owner will give false promises utilities will be installed. Of course, it never happens.

If the terms of the agreement are not kept, the family is thrown off the property only for the same thing to happen again to the next unsuspecting residents.

Sadly, these people have no recourse since they don’t understand English and barely have enough money to live.

Many of the houses in the Colonias barely stand up straight because they are built with a mixture of plywood, cinderblocks, metal scraps, and tar paper.

Residents have extension cords running from one shanty to another trying to get electricity to their shelters. Some shelters are a little better than a cardboard box.

While driving through the area, I saw one makeshift home that had three “walls” (scrap wood) barely secured and no roof. A baby was sitting outside of the “home” in the 100-degree heat left in a stroller by himself. There was no one around.

It was beyond imaginable. I wanted to stop and rescue the child, but we had to keep driving to our destination. This is the hardest thing about being a community worker; you are overwhelmed with the thousands of needs everywhere you turn.

RELATED: 25 Different Methods of Prayer That Are Powerful

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How to Emotionally Reconnect with Your Family?

If you want to emotionally reconnect with your family, look outside of yourselves and focus on others. One of the ways we did this was  One home we visited was basically a dumping ground for garbage and old metal scraps.

The “house” was a big box on blocks with no electricity, water, or sewage. The people inside were barely existing.

It smelled like death. Yes, death has a smell. 

We found dead rats under the house that had been meticulously slit open and gutted. It appeared they had been eating the rats for food. This still haunts me. I don’t know how they were living this way.

The good news is that a day later our teens decided we should all go back and help them clean up their yard. We also brought more food for the family.

All of this happened because we discovered them while walking in the area, and the teens decided to go back the next day. This one act changed the trajectory of a family’s life. Eventually, they accepted Jesus and moved.

From this one experience, my kids learned how their behavior affects others greatly, not to mention how blessed they truly are to live the life they have. They would never have learned this at home in Dallas. There are some things you just have to experience firsthand.

RELATED: Intentional Parenting: 9 Meaningful Activities to Do With Your Kids

How Do You Emotionally Reconnect with Your Family?

You may wonder why going on a mission trip in an area that is dirty and forgotten will help you emotionally reconnect with your family. It seems counterintuitive.  The secret sauce is that volunteering together away from home will help you to find what really matters.

My otherwise, phone-addicted teenage children, had to put down their devices for several days and work. At first, it was shocking because the world was no longer about them. But after a while, they started to engage with the community. More importantly, the children. They started to understand what poverty looked like, they felt it’s relentless sting. And then they realized how blessed they were to have so much.

This alone changed me as I watched my kids find the true meaning of life in this community service project. True happiness is not found in a bigger house, a faster car, or a better job. It is found in giving to others who will never be able to pay you back.

When you see your son pick up trash in a stranger’s yard for hours or you see your daughter give a child extra snacks because he has not eaten all day, it makes you realize this is the best thing your family has ever done together.

My family found true purpose in the heat, dust, and dirt of an abandoned area that no one else cares about. We found who we really are as a family and as Christians who love Jesus.

I will be forever grateful for this is one of the greatest family bonding activities as it truly bonded my family together and they learned how to have compassion for others.

My daughter has said over and over again she would rather be in South Texas than on a big, fancy vacation.

RELATED: 15 Pro Tips For Raising a Teenage Girl (Who May Be Difficult)

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How Do You Bond With Kids?

Don’t miss the opportunity to do one of the best family bonding activities with your family. Find something that fits you and your kid’s passion. It will make the time together more meaningful and fun. It helps if they have friends doing it too.

Warning: Your kids may complain at first, so don’t give in to the whining. Once you get there, everyone will eventually settle in and find where they fit best in the community activity. Make sure you have a great attitude and are willing to help or your kids will pick up on it.

They won’t want to help if you don’t help.

Once the day is over, talk as a family about what happened and how everyone felt about what they saw. Let them share their experiences. You will be amazed at what they learned. In fact, you may even cry when you see how it changed them forever.

I would love to hear how your family bonding activities changed your family. Write it in the comments below. 

Got Family Problems? There is Help and Hope!

Are you experiencing family problems or have a family estrangement? Do you feel shame, anger, or rejection? Check out my book Estranged: Finding Hope When Your Family Falls Apart on Amazon or at your favorite digital store. 

This book not only talks about my seven-year estrangement (and reconciliation) from my Christian family but also gives solid tips to help you with your family problems. Break free from your pain. Allow God to heal you no matter what has happened in your family of origin. There is hope when your family falls apart.

Creating Family Memories Book

Get Creating Family Memories. This book will help you manage your family in a way that allows more time to be intentional with your kids.  It includes a schedule too. You can get it at your favorite bookstore.

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