How to Stop Living You Life in Fear

Do you find it difficult to stop living your life in fear? I understand all too well. I have struggled with fear for years. It is hardwired into my brain. I especially deal with fear as a momma.

Looking back, I realized this habit of fear started when I was a young child and has stayed with me ever since. Being a Christian has helped, but I have struggled so many times making that jump to faith. Logically, I know I can trust God; sadly, it’s my emotions that get out of control.

Perhaps, like me, you worry about your babies. My babies are big, but I still fight worry and fear. 

It is easy to get panicked when what you see on the surface looks hopeless or frightening. And then not run with it emotionally–getting into the “what ifs.” It can get exhausting. And it is not productive. God has a better plan, but what He asks isn’t easy.

You see, what God is asking us to do is believe in Him even in the darkness. Trust that He is good even when all we see is bad at the moment.

And that, my friends, is where most of us get stuck.

Believing what we can’t see. Not a small order, if you ask me. 

In this post, I am going to show you what I do to fight fear. These tools have helped me in my darkest hour. And I believe they can help you too. 

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How to Stop Living in Fear

How to Stop Living in Fear

I believe God wants us to stop living in fear. It is not the best plan for our life. In fact, the scriptures tell us to live by faith and in peace. Furthermore, this is how we please God. We are to take fear captive.

Here are six ways to help you stop living in fear. And they really work!

 

1. Pray scripture

These verses have helped me deal with my fears. You can add your name in the scriptures to make it personal. Praying scripture back to God is one of the most powerful things you can do to help strengthen your faith.

1 John 4:18

International Standard Version
There is no fear where love exists. Rather, perfect love banishes fear, for fear involves punishment, and the person who lives in fear has not been perfected in love.

John 14:27

Good News Translation
“Peace is what I leave with you; it is my own peace that I give you. I do not give it as the world does. Do not be worried and upset; do not be afraid.

2 Timothy 1:7

New Living Translation
For God has not given us a spirit of fear and timidity, but of power, love, and self-discipline.

Psalms 23:4

New Living Translation
Even when I walk through the darkest valley, I will not be afraid, for you are close beside me. Your rod and your staff protect and comfort me.

Is 35:4

New Living Translation
Say to those with fearful hearts, “Be strong, and do not fear, for your God is coming to destroy your enemies. He is coming to save you.”

Ps 27:1

New Living Translation
A Psalm of David. The LORD is my light and my salvation–so why should I be afraid? The LORD is my fortress, protecting me from danger, so why should I tremble?

Ps 46:1

Good News Translation
God is our shelter and strength, always ready to help in times of trouble.

Is 41:13

New American Standard Bible 
“For I am the LORD your God, who upholds your right hand, Who says to you, ‘Do not fear, I will help you.’

Mark 5:36

New International Version
Overhearing what they said, Jesus told him, “Don’t be afraid; just believe.”

Estranged: Finding Hope When Your Family Falls Apart

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Ps. 91:5-7

New American Standard Bible

Do not be afraid of the terrors of the night,
    nor the arrow that flies in the day.
Do not dread the disease that stalks in darkness,
    nor the disaster that strikes at midday.
Though a thousand fall at your side,
    though ten thousand are dying around you,
    these evils will not touch you.

Ps 56:3

New International Version
When I am afraid, I put my trust in you

Ps 118:6

New International Version
The LORD is with me; I will not be afraid. What can mere mortals do to me?

Duet 31:16

New International Version
Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the LORD your God goes with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you

By the way, you can pray for your children using scripture. This works wonders when you are fearful about something they are facing. Check out this post for more information. How to Pray for Your Children

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2. Take a step of faith

Take a step of faith. Sounds simple, yet it is so hard. We can choose to believe God is going to take care of us even when we are fearful.

Here is an example: I am not a fan of flying in an airplane.

Every time I board a plane, I choose to take a step of faith that God will take care of me no matter what happens. My life belongs to Him. Sometimes I white knuckle my faith; I am doing it scared. 

It isn’t that I have conquered all my fears; it is that I choose to believe God in the midst of my fears. 

I have found that when I do take that step of faith and trust God, it is so freeing. I find I can enjoy my life to the fullest.

It makes me want to believe Him again and again.

Funny thing…when I started believing God, I stopped believing the lies Satan told me.

I have found believing God is about habit more than anything. You keep building off the last time you trusted Him. Other times it is just a choice. It is about breaking old habits of doubt and making new habits of faith. You are rewiring your brain. Maybe I have had brain damage…

Hebrews 11:6 ESV

And without faith, it is impossible to please him, for whoever would draw near to God must believe that he exists and that he rewards those who seek him.

Related: How to Not Lose Faith: 7 People Who Were One Hot Mess

 

3. Study the Names of God

Studying the names of God has helped me to stop living in fear. Just like when you spend time with a friend, you learn more about him and build trust.

The same goes when you study God’s names. The more time you spend learning about  Him, the easier it is to trust Him.

Read these and see if it helps you stop living in fear.

  1. El Shaddai -Lord God Almighty
  2. Jehovah Shammah-The Lord is There
  3. El Elyon-The Most High God
  4. Yahweh-Lord, Jehovah
  5. Jehovah Nissi-The Lord My Banner
  6. Jehovah-Raah-The Lord My Shepherd
  7. Adonai-Lord, Master
  8. Jehovah Rapha-The Lord that Heals
  9. Jehovah Mekoddishkem-The Lord Who Sanctifies You
  10. El Olam-The Everlasting God
  11. Jehovah Sabaoth-The Lord of Hosts
  12. Elohim-God
  13. Jehovah Tsidkenu-The Lord Our Righteousness
  14. Qanna-Jealous
  15. Jehovah Jirah-The Lord Will Provide
  16. Jehovah Shalom-The Lord is Peace

Wow! Look how powerful God is. He is amazing. Keep reminding yourself of this truth. 

Related: Reading the Bible: Are You Bored to Death?

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Purple flower in water with a text overlay.

4. Accept God’s love

God loves you. Even as a Christian, who was raised in the church, I have had a hard time believing this. I never doubted His love for everyone else, but I could not grasp His love for me. This happens more than you think.

Perhaps you have had some bad things happen to you, so it is hard to trust God.

Unfortunately, many people confuse human behavior with God’s behavior. Sometimes we see God through an authority figure who has disappointed us.

Here is the truth: It is man who is sinful, not God.

Man has a free will to do as he chooses. And sometimes that doesn’t look like God.

It is at this point we have a choice to either run to God or be angry and blame Him. When we blame God, we separate ourselves from real love. John 4:18 says, “There is no fear where love exists…”

When we abide in God’s love, we don’t need to fear. We can rest in Him and trust Him to work out all things for our good. Even when we can’t see or understand his plans.

Related: Family Issues: Questioning God’s Love

 

5. Choose Good Entertainment

If you want to stop living in fear then choose good entertainment. I have found that what I see, read, or hear makes a difference in my thought life. Certain TV shows, movies, books, or music can trigger fear.

Once all those fearful things enter the mind, it is hard to delete it.

Satan is very tricky about exposing us to media that is not edifying. If you are having issues with fear, it might help to do an inventory of what you are taking in on a daily basis.

For that matter, this goes for your kids too. If your kids are having nightmares, chances are they are having too much screen time.

Cut back and find other things to do.

Philippians 4: 8

New International Version
Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable–if anything is excellent or praiseworthy–think about such things.

Related: When You Feel Like You Have Failed as a Parent

 

6. Worship Music

Sing and worship your way out of fear. I know, it sounds nuts. You can’t believe how much this helps though. It is my secret weapon.

Sometimes I sing at the top of my lungs when no one is listening. I am not that great of a singer…but it works. I probably scare anything away with my voice alone. 

Crank it up in the car or in the house and just keep singing. You may be tempted to put on Beyonce or some other great singer, but stick to worship music.

This is what David (King David) did with his harp when he was just a boy. He chased away King Saul’s demons every time he sang his songs (Psalms). When he stopped singing the demons would come back and torment Saul (1 Samuel 16:23).

If you are skeptical…try it. But keep the loud stuff for when you are alone or your family may think you are looney.

 

Fear is a Choice

Fear is a choice you make every day. You can choose to trust God or you can choose to look at the circumstances. It is so natural to look at the circumstances. I understand, believe me. 

When you choose to stand on God’s word, trust His love, and believe Him then you can keep fear at bay. Personally, I am tired of living in fear. It is defeating. I want to be someone who is courageous and lives by faith!

How do you deal with fear?

 

Book on Family Estrangement From a Christian Point of View

Are you experiencing family problems? Perhaps you and a loved one are no longer speaking. Don’t go another day without reading this book. It addresses family problems and estrangement from a biblical point of view. Estranged: Finding Hope When Your Family Falls Apart is on Amazon or in your favorite digital store. 

Estranged: Finding Hope When Your Family Falls Apart

Get Creating Family Memories for FREE in exchange for your email. If you get this book, it will help you build a good relationship with your kids so that when the hard times come (teen years), you will be able to weather the storm.

Scroll down or look to the side to sign up. You can also get it at your favorite bookstore.

 

Facebook Group

Continue the conversation on Facebook and join the group Christian Parenting and Family. This is a place for moms with preschool age kids or older to talk about their struggles with parenting, family life, education, or marriage. You will find biblically based advise from other moms who want to raise godly kids.

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12 Comments

  1. Lola on June 19, 2019 at 7:18 am

    Good afternoon!I appreciate your blog, although, I’m still single. Will there be future topics that will help prepare for marriage? I’m forty-one, it’s my birthday on Monday anyway.
    Thank you!

    • Julie Plagens on June 19, 2019 at 5:00 pm

      Lola, thank you so much for your comment. And Happy Birthday!! If you look at the navigation bar, click on “The Blog.” There is a drop-down menu. You will see “Christian Marriage.” I think some of the posts may be helpful. Thanks for contacting me. Take care.

  2. Juanita Deloris on March 12, 2019 at 12:46 pm

    I enjoyed this post. Quite the encouraging, helpful, read in regards to overcoming fear. Thanks for sharing!

    • Julie Plagens on March 16, 2019 at 11:42 am

      Juanita, I am so glad it was encouraging to you. It is not easy to overcome fear. Thanks for reading.

  3. Erin on March 11, 2019 at 8:45 pm

    As a mom of a chronically ill child, I struggle with fear a lot. I am afraid of him getting sick, of us not being able to get his meds, that insurance won’t pay for something, and so on. I love what you said here about praying scripture and being mindful of what media I’m exposing myself to. Very insightful.

    • Julie Plagens on March 16, 2019 at 11:45 am

      Erin, I am so sorry. I can’t imagine how hard it is not to be fearful or worry. I do believe God works in mighty ways. It is not always how we think or want, but He is there holding our hand through the storms. I just keep going back to His word and worshipping Him when I fall down. Thanks for your comment.

  4. Yaa Attobrah on March 11, 2019 at 7:29 pm

    This is a very informative blog on not living in fear. No matter what I do fearful thoughts always find a way of intruding into my mind. You have certainly provided some great insights in dealing with fear. Bless you.

    • Julie Plagens on March 16, 2019 at 11:49 am

      Yaa, I hope these tips will help you. It is so hard not to be fearful when life brings such hard circumstances to us. God says so many times to “Fear not.” I have to believe He knows my future. He is wise and loving. Thanks for reading.

  5. Kristal Molina on March 11, 2019 at 3:01 pm

    I recently got free from living in fear and since then my life has changed so much. It is an emotional prison for sure. There is such a great and encouraging post. The verses are perfect to meditate on. Thanks for sharing.

    • Julie Plagens on March 16, 2019 at 11:50 am

      Kristal, I am so glad that you have recently broken free from this prison. I would love any additional tips you have found to help you live free from fear. Thanks for your comment.

  6. Lori Ferguson on March 11, 2019 at 9:17 am

    Wonderful suggestions – I especially appreciate your 3rd point!

    My husband and I are working through a book about the names of God, by Ann Spangler. It’s been quite an eye-opener as we discuss the questions and relate His different names to our life together.

    • Julie Plagens on March 16, 2019 at 11:51 am

      Lori, I have done several studies on the names of God. Every time I do this study, I find that I am in awe of His goodness, power, mercy, healing, and love. Thanks for reading.

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