Check out these 15 signs of a healthy marriage you need to read.

Anyone willing to put in the time and effort to be a better spouse can learn these behaviors.

Research shows that couples who practice these same essential habits and patterns, no matter what is occurring, successfully weather the storms of life together.

As a Christian, you may think you already practice good behaviors because you are a person of faith. While this is good, you must continue to grow as a person. Truthfully, being a Christian doesn’t automatically make you a healthy person, nor does it ensure you to have a healthy marriage that lasts.

In this article, you’ll find 15 proven signs of a healthy marriage and how to foster them in your relationship as a Christian.

As someone who has been married for 30 years, I can tell you these behaviors are essential to nurturing a successful marriage that stands the test of time.

What Are the Fifteen Signs of a Healthy Marriage?

Check out these 15 proven signs of a healthy marriage that you need to be doing as a spouse.

These behaviors are not always easy (even for a Christian), but they work! If you consistently practice them, you will notice your spouse responding to you more kindly over time.

1. Communication

Good communication is one of the most significant signs of a healthy marriage. Feeling safe expressing your thoughts and desires makes it easier to bond emotionally as a couple and stay in love.

I suggest spending 15-30 minutes a day just talking. Turn off the TV and the phone, and tell your kids to go play. Train your kids not to disrupt you during this time. Yes, it’s that important!

2. Mutual Respect

A happy marriage is built on mutual respect. Each partner values the other’s opinions, feelings, and needs. Most of all, they treat each other with kindness and consideration. This kind of respect also means not trying to change the other person.

If you find your spouse disrespectful, appropriately express that the behavior is unwelcome. Set boundaries and confront disrespectful or rude behavior when it happens.

RELATED: How to Change Your Husband Without Saying a Word

3. Shared Values

If you are a person of faith, choosing someone who shares similar core beliefs, principles, and priorities is essential. The Bible says, “Do not be unequally yoked with unbelievers…” (2 Cor. 6:14).

This scripture is an important word of caution to those wanting to marry outside their faith. Paul says not to do it; it will cause many problems.

If you are already married to an unbeliever, Paul doesn’t recommend divorce. Instead, he suggests continuing to love your spouse so your behavior may win them over (1 Peter 3:1).

4. Quality Time Together

Happy couples prioritize quality time for each other. Whether it’s date nights, shared hobbies, or simple daily routines, they enjoy each other’s company.

My husband and I regularly take walks around the block after dinner. It is a good way to catch up from the day and get exercise at the same time. Also, there are no interruptions!

5. Trust

Trust is an essential component of a happy marriage. This includes trust in each other’s words, actions, and decisions.

See also  30-Day Marriage Challenge to a New Spouse

Although it is possible to recover when trust is broken, it is hard. Trust can be earned again over time. Still, repentance and behavior change are necessary for it to be sustainable. Trust is different from forgiveness.

6. Forgiveness

Happy couples forgive each other often. They understand that everyone has flaws and that forgiveness is crucial when dealing with conflicts and disagreements.

Forgiveness is not optional. It is not earned, nor is it always deserved. Sometimes, you choose to forgive and then ask God to bring the feelings of forgiveness to your heart.  It’s okay if the feelings come later.

RELATED: 5 Reasons to Forgive Those Who Hurt You (Even If They Don’t Deserve It)

7. Patience

One of the greatest signs of a healthy marriage is actively practicing patience. It is the ability to remain calm and understanding in facing challenges, disagreements, and difficult situations.

Patience is not about suppressing your emotions or avoiding discussions (communication) but about constructively managing your feelings.

1 Corinthians 13:4- Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude.

8. Laughter

Laughter and humor play crucial roles in a happy marriage. Laughter is an excellent stress reliever, releasing endorphins and promoting well-being.

When couples laugh together, they can alleviate tension and foster a more relaxed and positive environment.

If you are not laughing right now, find a way to add it back to your marriage.

9. Flexibility

One sign of a healthy marriage is flexibility. Couples who support each other through life’s changes and quickly adapt have a greater chance of staying together for the long haul.

A lot of changes occur in the life of a married couple. There is always some moving piece, from birthing babies to teenagers, health issues to caring for older parents, and even pay cuts.

Having a good attitude and adjusting to new changes with grace makes a huge difference and is one of the best signs of a healthy marriage.

10. Shared Responsibilities

Happy couples share household and parenting responsibilities. They work as a team and support each other in all areas of life. They are not resentful or reluctant to help each other out when needed.

It is essential to talk about who does what. More importantly, lean toward your giftings. If you are better at money, you keep the checkbook. If you like to garden, do the flowerbeds. (This does not include parenting as it is a team sport!)

Nothing is worse than letting your spouse struggle through something you can do with great ease and even enjoyment.

11. Healthy Conflict Resolution

One of the signs of a healthy marriage is the ability to resolve conflicts appropriately and constructively.

By calmly talking things through and thoughtfully coming to an agreeable solution, you can conquer any problem.

However, childish behaviors such as pouting, yelling, tantrums, biting (read my story below), eye-rolling, silent treatment, etc., can be destructive.

It’s time to show up as an adult and quit using childish weapons to get your way. They are not appropriate.

See also  The Most Powerful Secret to a Long, Happy Marriage

RELATED: How to Resolve Conflict in Marriage: 7 Biblical Ways to Healing  (This story is funny. I was so angry at my husband that I bit him.)

conflict resolution pdf

Get your FREE CONFLICT RESOLUTION (PDF) TIPS to help you and your spouse navigate difficult conversations.

12. Affection/Intimacy

Regular expressions of affection, such as hugs, kisses, and tender words, are common in a happy, healthy marriage. They make each other feel loved and appreciated.

Different than affection, but equally important is sexual intimacy. It is imperative to make time to be with one another. Otherwise, you are just roommates. Additionally, using sexual intimacy as a reward or punishment is not healthy.

One of the signs of a healthy marriage is an agreed-upon frequency free of manipulation or revenge.

13. Individual Growth and Autonomy

Allowing each other to pursue personal interests, hobbies, and goals helps balance individuality and togetherness.

Supporting each other’s personal growth and maintaining autonomy can contribute to overall marital satisfaction.

Encourage your spouse to grow and try new things. And don’t be afraid of failure. You don’t want to look back at the end of your life and have regrets.

difficult marriage and healthy family life

Dealing with marriage or family issues? Purchase your ebook or paperback on Amazon or buy Marriage Interrupted or Estranged at your favorite digital store.

14. Supportive Social Network

Maintaining a supportive network of family and friends can positively impact marital satisfaction.

A solid support system outside the marriage provides emotional and social support, which contributes to a happier marriage.

I highly suggest maintaining healthy friends and family relationships. Your spouse isn’t meant to meet all your needs, nor should you expect it.

RELATED: How to Make Mom Friends: 19 Easy Tips Even Introverts Can Do [Printable]

15. Commitment

One of the greatest signs of a healthy marriage is commitment—not a contractual commitment, but one based on a covenant. This kind of love (agape) is only possible with God’s help.

Covenant love means loving your spouse through the hard times. You are not always going to “feel” like loving every day. It is a choice because you are committed for life. *

*Sometimes, this is not possible when there is abuse. If you are in an unsafe relationship, get help and remove yourself from your abuser.

It’s important to remember that every marriage has its ups and downs; these signs are not fixed or absolute. However, they can indicate a strong and healthy marital relationship.

By building a strong foundation built on biblical principles, you are setting yourself up for a lasting, mutually beneficial relationship that glorifies God.

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15 Proven Signs of a Healthy Marriage That Lasts text with a flat lay of roses and pictures in the background.

What Increases Marital Satisfaction?

It’s important to note that every relationship is unique, and what contributes to marital satisfaction may vary from couple to couple.

I highly suggest you get Gary Chapman’s book The Five Love Languages: The Secret to Love That Lasts. (I’m not an affiliate.)

This will help you identify what your spouse needs to feel love from you genuinely. The five languages are acts of service, gifts, touch, quality time, and words of affirmation (encouragement).

While we need all of them, there will be one or two love languages that stand out over the rest and will contribute to marital satisfaction.

See also  Has God Abandoned Me? (5 Truths In the Silence)

What Does an Unhealthy Marriage Look Like?

Various factors can contribute to an unhealthy marriage. It’s important to remember that every relationship is unique, and what may cause unhappiness in one marriage might not necessarily apply to another. However, here are some common factors that can negatively impact marital satisfaction.

Financial issues, poor communication, lack of trust, power imbalance, external stressors, unresolved conflict, disrespect (rude), and lack of intimacy are just a few of the things that will destroy a marriage. (This is pretty much the opposite of the 15 signs of a healthy marriage.)

Truthfully, if you open up the lines of communication, you will start seeing signs of improvement in your marriage. There is little hope if you aren’t talking or if most of the talking is mean-spirited.

Healthy marriages take work and patience, but the rewards are worth it. As you work to build and sustain a healthy, loving marriage, keep in mind the 15 proven signs of a healthy marriage listed above as a guide to marital bliss.

Tell me what signs of a healthy marriage you would include in this list. Comment below. 

Are You Struggling to Have a Healthy Marriage? Do You Want to Change Your Spouse?

Get Marriage Interrupted: How to Deal with Unexpected Conflict as a Couple and Stay in Love on Amazon or any digital platform. This book has humorous and impactful insights for anyone experiencing marriage conflict.

Included is biblical advice to help couples develop new behaviors and strengthen their marriage with healthy boundaries. With over 30 years of marriage experience, there are practical tips to overcome old behavior patterns and rekindle a marriage relationship rooted in God’s love.

family estrangement

Got Family Problems? There is Help and Hope!

Are you struggling with family issues that have resulted in a family rift or a family estrangement? Are you feeling a sense of shame, anger, or rejection?  Check out my book Estranged: Finding Hope When Your Family Falls Apart on Amazon or at your favorite digital store.

In it, I share my own experience of a seven-year estrangement from my Christian family and how we eventually reconciled. Furthermore, I provide practical advice to help you navigate your family issues.

Don’t let the pain of estrangement hold you back. Allow God to assist you in healing, no matter what has happened within your family. Remember, there is always hope to be found, even when things seem to be falling apart.

A farm scene with a farmhouse upside down sitting on a grass field with a lake in the background. Creating Family Memories Book

Get Creating Family Memories. This book will help you manage your family so that you have more time to be intentional with your kids. It includes a schedule, too. You can get it at your favorite digital bookstore.

Join the group Christian Family Living on Facebook

Continue the conversation on Facebook and join the Christian Family Living group. This is a place for Christian women to freely talk about parenting, marriage, faith, family, and culture. Being a Christian is hard! Let’s do it together. Most of all, a sense of humor is required. Got memes? Bring it on!

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Julie is a wife, mom, teacher, author, and blogger. She writes about Christian family living, marriage, parenting with a touch of humor.


  1. Francis Duku Reply

    This is such a great advice needed among the married and those anticipating marrying.
    May the Lord continue to increase your wisdom to advice more.

    • Francis, thank you for your comment. A healthy marriage takes work but doing thses 15 things will give you a greated chance of success.

  2. Really good advice here. It certainly takes time and commitment. I guess some people forget this 🙂 Thanks for sharing!

  3. This is a very important article, to many couples go into marriage thinking they can work on changing the person until they’re satisfied or happy. That kind of marriage is a recipe for disaster.

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