How Entitlement Creeps Into Our Families
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Many parents do everything they can to raise a child who is smart and successful. Nothing wrong with that...We all want successful kids.
Unfortunately, there are those who resort to other tactics to get their child special treatment or go to great lengths to remove the consequences for bad choices. Not so smart, eh?
When well-meaning parents act this way, they do nothing more than short-circuit the growth of their child. They forget to teach wisdom.
Wisdom is gained while sitting in time out, or apologizing for bad behavior. It also happens when you allow your child to be counted tardy, or have him pay back the money for the broken window.
I admit, it is painful to watch your child wrestle through difficult issues, but it does him no good if you constantly remove him from learning through his experiences. You will stunt his growth and cause him more pain down the road than he will ever feel now.
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My Kid is the Best
Over the years, I have noticed an increasing desire (that’s putting it mildly) for parents to have kids who are the best at, well…everything.
I am sure there is a myriad of reasons, but mostly, I think it comes down to pride.
And pride makes us do some really crazy things.
Okay, so I realize most of you probably haven’t bought your child’s way into a prestigious university, but how many of you have written a note to school stating your child was sick when he really just woke up late?
Perhaps you let her stay home to finish a paper she should have done the day before? Or you have brought her lunch or forgotten homework up to school for the tenth time?
Guilty. Guilty, and… guilty.
And then my child did it again until I stopped saving him or her. (I won’t divulge the guilty party.)
Rescuing Your Child
Let’s get a little more personal here. How many of you have signed off on a reading log when your child didn’t really read the full allotted time? Or completed most of your child’s homework or Science Fair project?
Perhaps you are one of those parents who will just do the whole assignment yourself. You laugh, but I have seen this a lot!
Consequently, we have become a generation who rescues our kids. We are afraid to let our children fail because down deep it feels like we have failed too. Sometimes it is hard separating our child’s growth process with who we are as a person.
It is easy to get the two intertwined. I understand. Which is why I saved my kids a lot. And it hurt them.
I delayed them from working through hard problems and becoming independent.
The most important thing you can do is look to Jesus for who you are as a person, and continually point your child in the same direction.
Give up the pride and let your child experience life, the good and the bad. He will start to become wise when he feels things to the fullest degree. It won’t be easy, but you will be glad someday when he understands how life really works.
Related: How to Stop Living in Fear
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