Do you want to create family memories with your kids but often get distracted by life? Yeah, it happens to all of us.
Before you give up, let me give you some tips to help you be intentional with your time. You may think that family time is not a big deal, but it is!
If you have a deep relationship with your child, he will be less likely to stray from your family values because of the trust you have built over the years. Also, your child will not want to hurt you with his bad choices.
The problem is most of us have a crazy schedule. We are too busy with work, sports, school, and even church to create family memories.
What is discouraging is the time you do have together is mostly spent in the car, eating, or watching something with a screen.
What if I told you there is a way to multiply your time and create family memories that are meaningful despite all the distractions?
Making time for family is nothing more than adjusting your schedule and changing a few family habits. Family habits can slowly be added over time by being smart with the time you do have together.
In fact, it will become effortless once you do it for a period of time. Your kids may even remind you when you don’t do it!
In this post, I am going to give you some suggestions to create family memories even though you have a crazy schedule. And, by the way, it works because I did it with my family!
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Why Are Family Memories Important?
Family memories are important because it is during those special times that you develop a relationship with your kids. And a good relationship is the foundation of a healthy family.
In the early years of my parenting, I would find myself frustrated (more like exasperated) because we had been to a lot of places but hadn’t really done anything worthwhile. My children had watched too much TV/screen time, they were constantly fighting, and they weren’t even grateful for the fun stuff we did together.
Sound familiar?
As a teacher and mom, I knew better than to let things go crazy. We would never bond as a family if I didn’t change things soon. I was not using my time wisely. Duh!
After much reflection, I decided to change some of our family habits so that we would have more meaningful time together. And, wouldn’t you know it, things got better immediately.
Guess what? You can do the same thing as me. Don’t worry, you don’t have to be a teacher to do them. It’s easy.
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How Do You Make Memories?
Here are some great ways to make memories with your family. You will be grateful you did this as it will help you manage your time.
1. Set goals
It is a matter of sitting down and deciding what you want your family to look and act like years from now. I started by looking at how my kids were behaving now, and how I wanted them to behave.
I didn’t want to be oppressive, but I needed to get some structure and direction. If you fail to plan, then you plan to fail.
Kids don’t just come out as good citizens and godly people. There is a lot of thought that goes into the process.
The goal was to have fun and, at the same time, develop character, learn new skills, create family memories, and give back to others. It all seemed overwhelming at first, but I knew if I changed a few habits slowly I could make things happen without too much pushback.
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2. Create a family schedule
Sit down with your spouse first.
Talk through what you want to include in your schedule. Your schedule may include things like sports, lessons, art, eating together, reading time, nap time, devotional, walks, outings, friends over, volunteer, and free time.
Then talk to your kids. See what kinds of things they would enjoy doing when they are home all day or part of the day. The more they have ownership, the easier it will be to follow it.
The point is to have things to do so your kids don’t default to screens. Leave that for free time or rewards. Check out this link to see a sample schedule.
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3. Follow through with your day
This sounds silly to say, but you would be amazed how easy it is to ditch the schedule and let your kids talk you into watching TV, playing video games, or staying on the iPad for hours on end. This will not help you build relationships and create family memories.
It is important to be excited about your schedule and to stick to it even if there is whining. If you have a stay home job it will be much easier to tell the kids where they need to be and what they need to do. If they are off task, you can redirect them quickly.
And then when you take a break, you can do something fun together that you planned. This is a great way to create family memories even when you work.
A schedule will also cut down on the fighting. It really is a great thing!
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Creating Family Memories Is Work!
I can honestly say doing this was the best thing I ever did with my family, but it was work. We are still very close to my adult kids because we took the time to create family memories when they were young.
Don’t get me wrong, I am not promising a perfect family. You will still have issues to work through together. The good times you create together will help you have a relationship to fall back on when you need it most–the teen years.
Believe me, when you have a teen, there will be storms. This is when it is most important to keep doing things together as a family. And don’t let them talk you out of spending time together because they will try.
One of my kids wanted to watch TV during dinner instead of sitting at the table. We didn’t go for it. Said child pouted through a lot of dinners. We just kept eating and talking. That was a LONGGG phase.
You can start this plan no matter the age of your children, although it is easier to start when they are younger. You will have less pushback.
It is hard to change some family habits when kids are older. Don’t let that scare you. You will see it is the best thing you ever did as a parent.
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How to Create Family Memories-Book
So how do you create family memories in more detail? Perhaps you don’t even know where to start. This is why I wrote a book. It is called Creating Family Memories: How to Make Family Time with a Crazy Schedule.
It is a short book that can be read in about 3-4 hours. It is designed for busy parents who don’t have a lot of time to read a bunch of fluff. This book explains in detail what I did so you can do the same thing.
It gives three levels of fun. Kid fun, family fun, and other-centered fun. The book shows how important it is to move past kid fun and move into higher levels of fun as a family.
This is where you get into real bonding, and you learn to create family memories.
From there, I give you several examples of what it looks like in action. Then I give a detailed schedule that can be adjusted to your child’s age.
It doesn’t matter if you work full-time or you are a stay-at-home mom. Once you understand the concepts and create your goals, you can make your own family schedule.
How do you create family memories? Comment below!
Got Family Problems? There is Help and Hope!
Are you experiencing family problems or have a family estrangement? Do you feel shame, anger, or rejection? Check out my book Estranged: Finding Hope When Your Family Falls Apart on Amazon or at your favorite digital store.
This book not only talks about my seven-year estrangement (and reconciliation) from my Christian family but also gives solid tips to help you with your family problems. Break free from your pain. Allow God to heal you no matter what has happened in your family of origin. There is hope when your family falls apart.
Creating Family Memories Book
Get Creating Family Memories. This book will help you manage your family in a way that allows more time to be intentional with your kids. It includes a schedule too. You can get it at your favorite bookstore.
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Thanks for sharing! I will save this post for when we expand our family!
Athena, thanks, hope it helps.
Thanks for your tips. My parents are very busy as well. But they do manage to spend time with us. I really appreciate their efforts.
I am so glad to hear that. It is really important. Good for your parents.
Love the idea of setting goals! It is so true!!
Sophia, yes, goal setting really helps. It will give you direction.
I would never run my classroom the way I too let my house get out of control sometimes. But we can only control so much right??!!!
Yes! It definitely got way too loosy-goosy at home. I guess no one was going to fire me if they didn’t pass their TAKS test. I just wanted to be fun and not have to do the discipline part. Yeah, that just sounds stupid when I write this. I know better. Thanks for reading.
When you get older you realize how important family is. My dad passed away in February of this year and I am so thankful for the memories I’ve got that I hold dear. I like the idea of the memory book, that’s a great idea too!
Thanks! I am so sorry about your father. I am glad your family made good memories. Thanks for reading.
This is excellent advice! We are potty training in my home and have a two month old, so unfortunately fun has not been a priority lately. :/
Oh, goodness. I hope you can add some good things in between the difficult things. The toddler years are hard!
I tend to put off fun and memory-making, because it’s extra hard with eight kids! I have to plan ahead like crazy for even just the simplest things, like car rides, so people don’t end up fighting and crying and making me crazy. But I’ve been feeling like I need to prioritize it, and your suggestions here really help. I need your book! 🙂
Eight kids is a lot. My book has a flexible schedule. It might help you. Truthfully, I bet you could teach me a few things. I bet you homeschool and have a schedule. Good luck! Thanks for reading.
Great advice! Taking time for family is definitely a priority in our house.
Car, I am so glad you take time for your family. Thanks for reading.
You are right it is so important to push through the challenges and resistance to make it happen! We love our Friday family movie nights. Now that the kids are older, it does not always happen on a Friday but we still try to find a night of the week to have movie night.
That sounds fun! I bet your kids enjoy this and look forward to time with you. We used to do the same thing many years ago. Thanks for reading.