Why is faith important for a married couple? What you and your spouse think and believe about God will directly impact your marriage and how you raise your kids.
Unfortunately, many people don’t take the time to figure this out until they are married. And then they spend most of their married life arguing about how to approach the “God” subject.
In this post, we will discuss why is faith important in your marriage and eventually, your family. You may be surprised how your beliefs affect more than you think.
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Why is faith important?
So why is faith important? It is because it impacts your life in every way. Even if you don’t have faith, it is still a choice that affects your marriage and family. Your morals and values will be at the core of how you treat your spouse, earn a living, and raise your kids.
Even if you and your spouse have faith, eventually it can get messy if you don’t believe the same things. Especially, if you decide to have kids. All of a sudden, you are pressed on how to raise your kids, which church (if any), and what is true.
Therefore, the sooner you and your spouse get on the same page, the better. Otherwise, you are going to have some difficult days ahead of you. Ask why faith is important now instead of later.
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How Does Faith Impact Your Family?
Faith impacts our lives in every area. It impacts how we treat people, work ethic, and the moral compass in our marriage. Faith is especially important when it comes to parenting.
In fact, your view of God could have an impact on how well your kids turn out. Perhaps you don’t know that kids tend to repeat what you do, not what you say.
So if your behavior doesn’t reflect a solid moral faith, then check out the reasons you may be struggling.
Here are four ways you may see God, and how it impacts your marriage and family:
1. God is a bellhop
You put your order in and presto! It is supposed to appear for you. If you don’t get it, you just didn’t have enough faith.
Perhaps you have been told that if you believe in God, all of your problems will go away, and you will get whatever you want. The old “name it and claim it” mentality.
In fact, you may not even believe in God, but this is your worldview, in general. It is all about accumulating stuff. Hoping one day it will make you happy if you just get…
Impact:
If you carry this belief system into your family, you could see your kids treating you the same way. Perhaps more as an ATM than a person.
Over time, your family will be more concerned about superficial things than relationships.
One day you will wake up realizing you are surrounded by all your toys, but you have not invested in the people around you. Your relationships will be shallow and superficial. And your kids will be sad you weren’t there for them when they needed you the most.
Your family legacy will be more about things than people.
2. God is a mean old man
Perhaps you think God is cruel.
You picture Him with a white beard and a lightning bolt in His hand (like Zeus) waiting to zap you. You think he’s angry all the time and a real killjoy.
Impact:
Your faith is severe. Your family is more about rules instead of a relationship. More law than grace. You rule with threats and fear.
Many times kids end up hating their parents when this parenting style rules the home. They can’t wait to leave when they turn 18. There is no love to draw them back.
Your family legacy will be one of broken relationships, unforgiveness, and maybe even an estrangement.
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3. God is disengaged or doesn’t exist
You are angry about things that have happened to you or the ones you love. Perhaps you are convinced a loving God could never be a part of this world. You do not understand real love means allowing free will. And that is why you can’t agree on faith.
Impact:
Lack of faith translates into a family with no direction.
It’s more about following your own set of rules. Eventually, your family becomes a moral vacuum. Your child has no moral compass so he does what feels good to him at the time. Without values, your child has nothing to stop him from making his life and yours a living hell.
Kids are too young to create a moral code that is even remotely sustainable long term. They do not have the wisdom of living to see where certain choices end up years down the road.
Your family legacy will be one of heartache. You will wonder what happened, and where you went wrong because your child is in one mess after another.
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4. God is Lord and Savior
Believing in God is the best choice for you and your spouse. Coming to this point in your marriage is not easy.
Usually, we try everything else before we humble ourselves before God and give up striving. It doesn’t feel natural to put our hands down.
Yet, this is what he asks. He wants us to give our life over to Him so He can transform us into His image.
Impact:
Faith in God translates into a healthy marriage and family. It’s about lovingly instilling biblical morals and values in your relationships. This philosophy creates a deep love between family members and an overall feeling of security.
This doesn’t mean kids don’t rebel, sometimes they still do. But parents who stay the course and love their kids through it find many times they come back. It is the love of God that draws them back.
Once your kids have a taste of the real thing, the counterfeit doesn’t satisfy any longer.
If you follow Jesus, your family legacy will be one of healthy relationships built on something greater than you.
You will pass down a heart of forgiveness that flows freely through your family system. Most of all, grace will abound.
RELATED: 5 Reasons to Forgive Those Who Hurt You (Even If They Don’t Deserve It)
Does Faith Require Action?
Faith is not simply just believing in God, it requires action. When you follow God, your behavior changes. You no longer want to act in a way that is sinful.
If you are not at the point of believing in God, I suggest you start somewhere. Perhaps start a conversation with your spouse. Ask why is faith important. It is better to be proactive than reactive.
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Why Is Faith Important In Marriage?
Why is faith important in your marriage? It is because it is the core relationship in your family unit. In fact, it permeates every area of your life. Moreover, it is even more important to pass down a legacy of faith in God to your kids.
I hope you will come to the realization that faith in God is the only parenting style that is sustainable long term. When your family is centered on God, it is rooted in love and relationship. In fact, love never fails.
Ask why is faith important in your marriage today so that you can pass on a legacy tomorrow.
Dr. Dobson gives some great wisdom on how to pass down your faith. You can see the loving relationship between him and Ryan. Ryan wasn’t perfect, but he circled back because of love.
Do you think God is more of a bellhop, a mean old man, doesn’t exist, or Lord? Has your philosophy spilled over into your marriage and family? Is it working? Do you need to re-adjust?
RELATED: 15 Biblical Keys To a Successful Marriage That Are Powerful
Why is faith important to you? Comment below.
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Are you experiencing family problems or have a family estrangement? Do you feel shame, anger, or rejection? Check out my book Estranged: Finding Hope When Your Family Falls Apart on Amazon or at your favorite digital store.
This book not only talks about my seven-year estrangement (and reconciliation) from my Christian family but also gives solid tips to help you with your family problems. Break free from your pain. Allow God to heal you no matter what has happened in your family of origin. There is hope when your family falls apart.
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You are so right! Being on the same page about how to raise children in the faith is so important!
Oh I have been struggling with this. Thank you for the reminder of how to approach God.
I hope this will truly help you. Thanks for reading.
I used to think of God as Someone who was just waaaay too busy for me and my issues. But getting to know and understand how me cares for me and loves me intimately has also helped me show our children the type of God He really is.
I am so glad you are able to pass down a legacy of faith. Thanks for reading.
So very important! Thank you for sharing this beautiful article! I am still continually working on leaning not on my own understanding and I love the reminder here that we must approach God together!
This is truly something that parents need to be on the same page with each other. So glad you and your spouse are doing this.
This is a wonderful message and on a topic that can be hard to approach with children. Our children learn so much from watching and listening to us, we have to be a guide for them. Thanks for sharing!
Yes, what we do sure speaks a whole lot louder than what we say at times.
Thank you for this! Children learn so much by observation, and their attitude about God will first be formed by our attitude. Such a weighty thought!
It is a deep topic. I am so glad you are thinking about this.
I love this so much! It is a topic I don’t see too much about unfortunately, so I really appreciate you writing about it!
Thanks. It is a hard topic to discuss. Faith is hard when you are parents because you don’t always believe the same thing.
Wonderful you are writing about this. Parents have to set the example always for our children and their future grandchildren.
So true. We are role models whether we like it or not. Minus well do it right.
Definitely a topic that spouses should consider just as important as intimacy and money. Those are issues that can make or break a marriage – or make for an amazing one! So glad that you touched up on this important subject.
Yes, children and how you raise them seems to be a big issue in marriage. Hope this is good food for thought.
You offer some great challenges today! Thanks for writing about such an important topic. Our children need us to go to the Lord searching for His guidance as we teach them. And it starts with turning over our failings to Him so that He can work through our brokenness.
You are so right. It is hard for young parents to know this. Thanks for your comments.
You are right. We cant expect things from our children that we ourselves are not living out. Thank you. Powerful message